What is Narcissism? What is Narcissisim Personality Disorder in Men?
Narcissism personality disorder is a mental issue characterised by an excessive focus on one’s wants and demands, frequently at the expense of those of one’s social group. Narcissism is a personality feature that can take on either a healthy or unhealthy form.
Many psychologists agree that narcissism is natural and healthy for humans. Still, they also acknowledge the existence of pathologically narcissistic cases, such as those exhibiting the symptoms of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD).
What is Narcissisim?
Narcissism is the inability to put one’s needs before those of others. Everyone has moments of narcissism, but true narcissists often put their own needs ahead of those of others and their feelings. They are oblivious to the impact their actions have on others.
Narcissism is not just a character flaw; it can also be a symptom of a more serious personality disorder. Since narcissism exists on a spectrum, not all narcissists have NPD. Those at the extreme end of the narcissism continuum are those diagnosed with NPD. However, others may exhibit narcissistic features but not meet the criteria for a full NPD diagnosis.
Explain the Nature of Narcissisim Personality Disorder in Men
Instead of being merely a personality trait or a matter of preference, NPD is a recognised disorder of the mind.
Supporting and helping someone with a narcissism diagnosis requires understanding this distinction.
A mental health illness may impact a person’s mood, thoughts, and actions
As a result, this can have far-reaching consequences for people’s day-to-day lives and how they interact with others and perform at work.
The ability to recognise and comprehend one’s thought processes and motivations for one’s actions may be diminished in people with NPD, according to the cited study.
They may also need help understanding the motivations behind the actions of others.
Characteristics of NPD, a narcism personality disorder belonging to cluster B:
- excessively dramatic
- sentimental and passionate
- unpredictably erratic
Individuals who have the narcissistic personality trait do not all act similarly. One reason for this is that narcissism comes in many forms.
Definitions of Negative Traits of Narcissism
Most of us will exhibit narcissistic behaviour at some point in our lives. These may be narcissistic behaviours or attitudes, although they are not as severe, persistent, or long-lasting as those associated with a personality disorder.
Many different characteristics make up a person’s character. All of us exhibit them to some extent. The same holds for someone who exhibits narcissistic behaviour.
Some People May Have Narcissistic Tendencies as a Personality Feature.
For some, though, these narcissistic tendencies are so extreme that they irreparably damage their relationships with others and themselves.
It’s possible that some of our actions or thoughts can be attributed to narcissism.
A long-standing rivalry with a workmate is one possibility. Because of this, you can start making snide remarks in their presence or embellish the praise you received from your superiors. You may give them an unjustified low rating.
This is not an ongoing sentiment towards the rest of the staff but rather a rare reaction to this one coworker.
The narcissism that characterises someone with NPD, on the other hand, is not a passing phase.
For instance, you may be at odds with everyone in the office, even the boss. You consider yourself more knowledgeable and competent than those around you, deserving of a more prominent position.
You’ve had this happen at your last two workplaces. You have a widespread sense of superiority over your peers at work, school, and elsewhere.
Don’t forget that neuropsychiatric disorder is a mental illness. Without a specific person in mind:
- High in one’s estimation
- Confidence in one’s social abilities
- being aggressive
- Feeling genuine pride for what they’ve achieved
- maintaining a clean and presentable appearance
- competing vigorously
- opposed to you
What Signs Indicate Narcissistic Disorder?
The top nine indicators of NPD are:
- Characterised by an exaggerated perception of one’s own significance and rights. You know deep down that you can handle anything that comes your way because you are the best at it.
- Insatiable for adulation. Your sense of self-worth is like a balloon without a knot; it needs constant positive reinforcement to stay inflated. There are never enough expressions of affection or admiration.
- Want to be singled out for favours. Whether it’s a favour or an apology, you think you’re entitled to it since you’re better than everyone else. They should give in to your demands because of it.
- Overstating one’s abilities and successes. When discussing your background and work history, you have no qualms about lying or exaggerating.
- Taking criticism in a bad way. You want to be in charge and give yourself all the credit when things are going well, but you’re quick to point fingers when things don’t go as planned. It’s difficult to take feedback or own up to blunders since, naturally, it’s always the other person’s fault and never yours.
- Having unrealistic expectations of one’s own success, attractiveness, and power. To help you feel special and in charge, you tend to invent and believe exaggerated, unrealistic narratives about your success, relationships, and even how nice you look. Anything that could potentially derail the fantasy is dismissed or explained away. You envy those who have what you desire and want others to feel that way about you.
- Exploiting other people. You frequently take advantage of others for personal gain, intentionally or accidentally. You only care about the people in your life to the extent that they improve your appearance or social standing, and you rarely stop considering the consequences of your actions.
- Lacking the capacity or inclination to understand the perspectives of others. You are very attuned to how others respond to your wants and emotions. Still, you lack the capacity for empathy and cannot understand how other people feel. You may resort to demeaning or bullying others to boost your self-esteem. You’re not the type to “go deep” in your relationships, and you’re okay with it.
- Haughtily carrying oneself. You have an inflated sense of self-importance and entitlement, manifesting in behaviours such as monopolising conversations, condescending to those you deem “inferior,” and surrounding yourself with people you believe are just as exceptional.
Types of Narcissism Personality Disorer
The person who tends to cardio at the gym in the too-tight tank, who spends more time admiring his muscles in the mirror than working out, the coworker who posts countless photos of her face from every conceivable angle on Instagram; these are the kinds of people that might come to mind when you think of a narcissist.
However, there are several distinct varieties of narcissists. Thus, the trait is about more than just vanity.
Insidious Narcissists Hiding in Plain Sight
Covert narcissists are the antithesis of the stereotypical narcissist; rather than seeking attention and adulation, they are introverted, modest, aware of people’s opinions, and constantly envious. They may consider their suffering worse than everyone else’s or even think they’re the most physically unattractive person in the room.
The Narcissist with a Big Brain
They are proud of their intelligence and use it as the basis for their superiority over others.
Narcissist With a Physicality
Body image is very important to somatic narcissists. They have an unhealthy preoccupation with their own and others’ physical appearances, particularly their weight, and are quick to criticise others.
The Egocentric Believer
They take a “holier than thou” position, exaggerating their spirituality or closeness to God, then use this to intimidate or justify destructive behaviours against others. When a church leader claims they have a vision from God concerning another person or use their “higher” position to manipulate, injure, or shame others using Scripture, they engage in harmful behaviour.
The research on NPD also mentions the grandiose or “overt” kind, the stereotypically flamboyant and attention-seeking sort, and the high-functioning type, which refers to people who may use tendencies like competitiveness and exploitation to advance professionally or in other areas.
It’s important to remember that a wide range of observable qualities are associated with NPD, and each can manifest at varied degrees of severity.
Facters of NPD
Having narcissistic features as an adult does not necessarily indicate a personality problem because “by definition, narcism personality disorders are developed with time with many circumstances and through early age experiences, genetics, and environment,” as Hallett puts it. NPD typically manifests itself in one’s adolescence or early adulthood.
According to Hallett, a personality disorder diagnosis is unlikely until the patient is 18 or older. It’s important to remember that some narcissistic tendencies in children are typical of their age (teenagers are self-absorbed by definition), which is not necessarily indicative of a future illness.
For instance, scientists think that when a person’s interpersonal development is stunted, they may be experiencing the full start of NPD.
- Having a sensitive nature from the start
- Manipulation skills can be taught by either parents or peers.
- Being singled out for praise when doing something right and criticism when doing something wrong
- Abused or neglected severely as a youngster
- Poor or inconsistent parental supervision
- Growing up in a home where my parents had unreasonable expectations of me
- Overindulgence on the part of parents, classmates, or other family members
- Being the object of overwhelming praise without any constructive criticism to keep you rooted in reality.
- When parents or other people lavish you with compliments on your features or abilities to an unhealthy degree.
Some Other Qualities of A Narcissisim Personality Disorder Men
Narcissists Who Know How to Get Along with Others
The authors of an article in the July 2023 issue of Personality and Individual Differences, Gignac and Zajenkowski, hypothesise that grandiose narcissists with higher IQs exhibit less “narcissistic rivalry” and more “narcissistic admiration.”
Before delving into the study’s findings, I’d want to define grandiose narcissism, vulnerable narcissism, and narcissistic admiration and rivalry tactics.
Narcissism that is Both Weak and Arrogant
Narcissists are selfish, have an inflated sense of entitlement, and use deceit to get what they want. Researchers have linked grandiose narcissism to traits including the overbearing confidence, assertiveness, thick skin, and arrogance exhibited by the prototypical narcissist.
But, vulnerable narcissism is linked to feelings of inadequacy, social isolation, anxiety, melancholy, humiliation, paranoia, and a lack of confidence in one’s abilities.
Grandiose narcissism was the subject of Gignac and Zajenkowski’s research.
The Model of Narcissistic Idolatry and Competition
Individuals who suffer from grandiose narcissism are prone to feeling superior to others.
But how can they develop and keep up with such an exaggerated opinion of themselves?
How, then, do they rise to the top of society?
Two approaches can be identified in the narcissistic adoration and rivalry model:
This tactic appeals to the proactive aspect of narcissism by focusing on the ego’s need for adulation. To achieve this goal,
- one must promote and improve oneself to win over others’ admiration.
- Examples include seeming confident and charming,
- dressing in name-brand apparel,
- bragging about one’s abilities or successes,
- amusing others.
When people talk of narcissistic rivalry, they refer to their adversarial, self-defensive tendencies. When attempts at self-promotion and self-enhancement fall flat, narcissists often undermine the reputations of those in similar positions.
Verbal (e.g., mocking, insulting) and mental (e.g., emotional blackmail, gaslighting, bullying), as well as physical violence, are all possible forms of abuse.
How Narcissistic Admiration and Rivalry Relate to Intellectual Capacity
The following research intended to determine if narcissists’ access to resources, specifically their IQ, influences their strategy.
What good is intellect for?
- Narcissists with higher IQs are less likely to feel the need to insult others to boost their self-esteem since they are more likely to achieve and succeed.
- In addition, those with higher IQs who struggle with narcissistic rivalry may have a better grasp of this disorder’s personal and social costs.
- And much like clever psychopaths, savvy narcissists may be adept at adopting any persona they need to advance their social, professional, and/or personal agendas, including being cooperative, nice, compassionate, validating, forgiving, and so on.
A Look at the Research
The sample included 422 people, most of whom (58%) were college students. The average participant was 20 years old (the age range was 17-35).
The Narcissistic Admiration and Rivalry Questionnaire was used to evaluate grandiose narcissism. Several entries on this list include phrases like
“I enjoy it when another person is inferior to me” and “I show others how special I am.”
The Paper-Folding Test, the Baddeley 3-minute Reasoning Test, and the Synonym Test all assess objective intelligence.
The Self-Report Intelligence Questionnaire is used to evaluate a person’s subjective intelligence. A “percentile indicator approach” was used, “whereby cognitive intelligence and percentiles were defined/described, and the participant selected a value from 1 to 100 (slider scale) to reflect their self-assessed intelligence.”
The findings demonstrated a link between narcissistic admiration and competitiveness. Both subjective and objective assessments of intellect affected the relationship negatively.
The data analysis showed that true intellectual capacity (not just intelligence as judged by others) lowered the risk of narcissistic rivalry.
It stands to reason that only true intelligence would be linked to advantageous social outcomes, including higher levels of functioning in interpersonal relationships, more success at work, and higher levels of scholastic achievement.
The authors point out that there is a correlation between IQ and success in life, so intelligent narcissists are more likely to “live a life…consistent with their inflated self-views.”
In contrast, less discerning grandiose narcissists may “resort to diminishing others as an ego defence, to maintain an inflated self-view (i.e., narcissistic rivalry).”
At an IQ of 120 or above, the “positive association between narcissistic admiration and rivalry may diminish to near zero” (r 0.10).
For context, an IQ in the 90s is typical, while a score in the 120s is quite high. The percentage of people with an IQ of 120 or higher is roughly 10%.
Explaining Narcissists’ Capacity to Ignore Their Own Misdeeds
The word “splitting” has two meanings as applied to a narcissist.
First, a narcissist has an unrealistically high opinion of their moral rectitude. To the narcissist, you are inherently “bad” if you don’t share their worldview. They may launch a covert attack on your credibility if you refuse to accept their “sacred” self-image.
The narcissist may also divide off some aspects of their experience from their awareness in an unconscious manner. A common term for this divisive behaviour is “delusional amnesia.”
Delusional amnesia resembles dissociation, an unconscious defence mechanism related to distortion and denial. There is, however, a major distinction.
Delusional amnesia occurs when a narcissist forgets their terrible behaviour, instead of dissociation, when a person unconsciously separates himself from the reality of a traumatic experience.
A robber, for instance, may hold a bank teller at gunpoint. The emotional weight of the life-threatening situation is too great to handle.
An unconscious defence mechanism called dissociation may kick in to keep the teller’s body operating while allowing parts of their mind to briefly escape the scary encounter.
After escaping the attack, it’s possible they won’t recall certain details. Recalling these experiences in the future may be possible, but it will take time.
On the other hand, a narcissist may try to block out any information that contradicts their self-image. For instance, just the two of you are hanging out in the living room one night.
You voice your thoughts on why your child is experiencing anxiety, but they are disregarded. A muffled “Taylor is fine” comes from your partner’s lips. You tend to exaggerate matters. Do not parent like a snowplough. It’s disgusting.
You confront her, asking her to consider your point of view after being upset and angered by her dismissal and contempt of it.
She responds by shoving the dog out of the way, jumping up from the chair, nudging you, storming across the room toward the bedroom, and kicking the toys.
You confront her the following morning, worried about their violent behaviour, but she asks, “What are you talking about?
Neither the dog nor you ever came near me. Seriously, you must be insane. You’re completely making this up.
You are in shock, disbelief, and complete confusion right now. You saw your partner being violent and aggressive, and you know it. You may try to bring up the matter again later that day, but your partner may react more strongly this time.
“I did not engage in any such conduct. What you’re talking about is completely over my head. Seriously, you must be insane. Stop using gaslighting on me!
Being around someone so willing to believe their own self-deception and so quick to forget their mistakes is unsettling. It’s easy to start thinking you’re the crazy one. Perhaps this is why thinking about the narcissist’s hidden defences is so important.
Why? Having several identities means they can do whatever they want to anybody without facing much personal responsibility.
A person like this might be dangerous in their very nature. Because they do not accept responsibility for the initial abuse, they can erase any traces from their memory and continue the pattern.
It may be impossible for the person to take responsibility, feel genuine regret, gain insight, and alter their maladaptive behaviour if they don’t remember what happened.
It’s even more perplexing if they insist they did nothing wrong yet act like the victim and downplay the seriousness of the situation, such as bringing up the interaction from the previous night and blaming it on the fact that she had a horrible day and wasn’t feeling well the day after.
They admit the exchange wasn’t ideal but skilfully excuse and rationalise their own part in it. She still claims she remembers hurling, shoving, or kicking anything.
Or, a spouse who takes responsibility and shows empathy can admit, “What I did was inappropriate. Obviously, I terrified you, and that’s unacceptable.
I apologise. I plan on finding a therapist today. Someone like this takes responsibility for their actions and appreciates their impact on you.
They may make amends for any hurt they’ve caused in the relationship and strive for personal growth to avoid repeating the same mistakes.
The safety of your relationship should be evaluated if your partner suffers from delusional amnesia.
Does the person you care about just “forget” about their harmful actions?
If so, they could be able to harm you indefinitely on purpose. The ability to forget allows individuals to avoid responsibility, guilt, empathy, and the need to evolve and improve. It may be time to start thinking about leaving.
Can Narcissism Revolutionise the Corporate Fundraising Industry?
Have you ever considered that the personality trait of narcissism, typically seen negatively, could have a positive side?
My coworkers and I have uncovered an interesting correlation between one personality attribute and corporate fundraising success in the vast terrain of leadership, where leaders and leadership styles are as diverse as the organisations they direct.
Grandiose narcissism is a personality trait sometimes misunderstood and misconstrued as arrogance or a fixation on one’s accomplishment.
We used a custom-built machine-learning algorithm to examine the tweets of 2,377 top executives. In our research, we distinguished between two forms of grandiose narcissism: admiration and competition.
To be admired is to believe in fantastical worlds, to know that you are special, and to exude an innate charisma. On the other hand, rivalry is characterised by more aggressive narcissistic traits, such as hostility or putting people down.
The narcissistic trait makes people try so hard to prove their superiority over others that they turn to insults and other forms of humiliation.
Where Did We Find This?
Organisational leaders who are good at garnering admiration from others are more likely to be successful in raising money, suggesting that some forms of narcissism might be advantageous.
However, competition was found to have a detrimental impact on a company’s ability to raise funds, indicating that competitive traits associated with narcissism may be counterproductive.
Interestingly, despite the common belief that leadership is more closely associated with men, the gender of a company’s top executive has no bearing on the company’s ability to raise money.
Therefore, the success of a leader’s fundraising efforts depends not on the leader’s gender but on the leader’s particular personality qualities, such as grandiose narcissism.
This has significant implications since it goes against common assumptions about effective leadership. This finding highlights the importance of looking past preconceived notions about leadership and what constitutes an effective leader, regardless of gender.
Our research shows that executives who are also narcissistic tend to be more successful at raising money for their companies. One might reasonably inquire,
“Why is that?”
Here’s another way to look at it: It’s common knowledge that narcissistic leaders put themselves first. They seek recognition and glory and delight in being the centre of attention.
The corporation’s current objective in terms of fundraising is to amass as much capital as possible to use for future expansion.
Consequently, a leader’s fundraising performance benefits the organisation and reflects well on the leader. As a result, everyone involved benefits. In this case, the boss’s egocentric goals coincide with the company’s expansion objectives.
Higher Testosterone Levels in Narcissistic Men
There appears to be a widespread obsession with narcissism, as seen by the abundance of media coverage devoted to figuring out how to spot and deal with narcissists.
Even though we commonly label others as “narcissists,” narcissism is more accurately a personality attribute than a certain character type.
Narcissism manifests itself to varying degrees in different people, from some who display no signs of it to those whose every action appears to be motivated by narcissism.
Recent findings published in Psychological Science suggest that testosterone may play a role in influencing narcissism levels.
Psychologists generally divide narcissism into two categories. Individuals with grandiose narcissism have an inflated sense of self-importance and exhibit aggressive, conceited behaviour.
In contrast, persons who suffer from “vulnerable narcissism” frequently experience low mood and a sense of vulnerability.
High scorers on tests of grandiose narcissism are convinced that they are superior to others and eager to brag about it.
Those with high levels of fragile narcissism are extremely sensitive to criticism and require regular affirmation that they are unique and important to others. This new study centred on the topic of excessive self-importance.
Testosterone has long been linked to a desire for power and leadership. There are two aspects of grandiose narcissism, each connected to status-seeking in its own special way.
The “agentic” part is the part that actively seeks approval and awe from other people, usually by trying to improve one’s social standing. Because of the active nature of grandiose narcissism, a person may try to achieve their goals through extensive self-promotion.
However, the second aspect of grandiose narcissism can emerge if self-promotion fails. To describe this quality, we use the word “antagonistic.”
Antagonising grandiose narcissism causes people to engage in destructive patterns like putting others down to boost their self-esteem. Someone with a high level of grandiose narcissism may be pleasant and sociable so long as they are the object of others’ admiration.
However, the confrontational or exploitative side of narcissism emerges if their inflated feeling of self-importance is challenged in any way.
Researchers in this new study looked for links between adult men’s testosterone and these two aspects of grandiose narcissism. (Although both men and women generate testosterone, men typically have higher testosterone levels than women.) Researchers analysed testosterone levels in 283 males aged 18-44.
Testosterone levels were assessed by collecting blood samples in a clinical setting between 7:30 and 9:30 in the morning, when testosterone levels are typically greatest. Multiple narcissism scales were also completed by the guys.
Guys then filled out a self-report measure of testosterone that asked them to estimate where their testosterone level landed on a scale from low to high in terms of other guys.
Agentic narcissism, but not antagonistic narcissism, was linked to higher testosterone levels in men.
One interesting correlation was between agentic narcissism and men’s stated testosterone levels. In other words, males scoring higher on agentic narcissism were likelier to report higher testosterone levels.
The study’s authors were especially intrigued by the idea that agentic and antagonistic narcissism can stem from distinct biological factors. Higher than usual testosterone levels may contribute to the social bravado and status-seeking characteristic of agentic narcissism.
This makes sense, as testosterone has been shown to reduce anxiety and increase confidence and willingness to take risks. The positive results of taking risks and engaging in healthy competition might cause a positive feedback loop in which testosterone levels rise.
Antagonising narcissism may be motivated by distinct neural circuits from narcissism proper, given that it typically acts only in response to a threat to one’s position.
This study also added the unusual discovery that men’s self-reported testosterone levels coincided with their actual levels, indicating that the men were at least partially right in their guesses.
Testosterone levels dropped more than in other men. Agentic narcissism was likewise linked to higher levels of self-reported testosterone.
Although some studies have linked testosterone to personality qualities in both men and women, this study’s lack of female participants is a disadvantage.
However, The authors propose that future studies consider the possibility that estradiol, as women typically report higher levels of self-confidence and assertiveness around the time of their menstrual cycle when estradiol is at its maximum, exhibits a similar pattern of connections with narcissism.
Testosterone has a nuanced effect on character and behaviour. While this study found an association between testosterone and agentic narcissism, it was weak.
In other words, testosterone levels are only a small piece of the puzzle when tracing the roots of narcissism. Likewise, the direction of testosterone’s influence on agentic narcissism is unclear. Although testosterone may amplify narcissistic tendencies, it can also fuel aggressive, power-hungry pursuits.
Why Narcissists Are Prone to Developing a Sexual Obsession With Porn
The question of whether these diagnoses allowed people with personality problems to externalise responsibility for their frequently selfish behaviours was one of the first I addressed when I began posting challenges to the ideas of sex addiction and pornography addiction in 2012.
Many studies have been done in the meantime, pointing to the importance of underlying problems, including moral incongruence, emotional control deficits, and anxiety. Recent studies confirm my initial fears by showing that narcissistic traits contribute to the self-perception of being a paedophile.
The Selfish and the Pornographic
Previous studies have shown that high narcissists and those with a strong sense of entitlement are likelier to engage in pornographic behaviours.
According to recent studies, narcissists are more prone to indicate agreement with conspiracy theories, and people strong in narcissism and other qualities are more likely to identify as victims as an indication of their virtuosity.
In the last 20 years, as the internet has made pornography more accessible, the belief that pornography is addictive has spread like wildfire. The idea of a “porn addiction” is widely discussed and encouraged in online support and self-help communities.
These communities are notorious for their misogynistic, racist, and homophobic discourses and their promotion of widespread hostility towards the pornography industry, which they characterise as plotting to turn viewers into addicts.
Robert Aaron Long, apprehended in 2021 on his way to Tampa after committing multiple murders in Atlanta area massage parlours, was allegedly planning additional bloodshed against unnamed companies involved in pornography. Long told investigators he committed crimes to rid the world of temptations and “help others with sex addiction.”
Narcissism and Pornographic Substance Abuse: Opposites in Every Way
Narcissists blame others and avoid taking ownership of their actions or inactions, traits known as “externalising responsibility” and “blaming others,” respectively.
Seeing oneself as addicted to pornography, from the perspective that doing so is a form of externalised responsibility—blaming pornography for one’s sexual or interpersonal struggles—has recently been explored in published research where I had the honour to assist several excellent addiction-and-personality researchers.
Three investigations were conducted in the United States and one in Malaysia for four studies and samples used in this analysis. In total, there were 4,589 people included in these samples.
The third U.S. sample was a nationally representative one collected from YouGov national polling, and the first two were drawn from undergraduates around the country.
In all this research, participants filled out a battery of questionnaires, including the Five Factor Narcissism Inventory Short Form and the CyberPornography Use Inventory 4, which assessed both pornographic and compulsive viewing behaviours.
Consistent and strong relationships were found between narcissistic hostility and participants’ reported dependence on pornographic media across all samples. Associations were found to be stronger in American samples.
There was a significant relationship (r >.40) between narcissistic antagonism and self-identification as a pornography addict. Levels of narcissistic hostility accounted for more than 20% of the difference in reporting a problem with pornographic media.
Higher levels of narcissism, and more particularly hostile types of narcissism, predicted higher levels of pornography usage, but exclusively in U.S. samples, in line with previous findings.
Compared to characteristics of religion, levels of narcissistic antagonism proved to be a more reliable predictor of pornographic difficulties in the present study.
Thus, it suggests that narcissistic qualities may have a more significant impact than moral incongruence on developing a self-perceived pornography addiction.
The correlation between narcissism and pornography usage and addiction was weaker in the Malaysian sample than in the American group.
The study authors hypothesise this is due to individualistic versus communitarian cultural norms regarding personal accountability. Hopefully, in the future, scholars will be able to pinpoint exactly what it is about American culture that fosters hostile narcissism and addiction.
Using a unidimensional measure of narcissism, recent studies by Prause and Binnie also demonstrated that narcissism predicted pornographic self-identification.
The new study confirms this conclusion and adds insight into the role of narcissistic hostility, as opposed to other facets of narcissism (such as extroversion or neuroticism), in establishing this connection.
Narcissistic hostility is a term used to characterise the facets of narcissistic personality that manifest in entitled, exploitative, and hostile actions towards others.
Antagonic narcissism was the strongest predictor of the belief that pornographic material was addictive, suggesting a connection between this belief and a desire for immediate gratification, limited tolerance for frustration, and a propensity to pursue pleasure for one’s own sake.
To sum up, an aggressive person’s core value of avoiding blame for unintended consequences can cause them to rationalise their bad behaviour as unavoidable.
Persons with greater degrees of antagonistic narcissism are more inclined to blame external factors for their difficulties, which may reinforce and worsen their sentiments of antagonism, and to view themselves as unfairly suffering, persecuted by others, and experiencing unfair amounts of opposition.
Care for the Porn or the Narcissism?
The results of this study have important clinical implications for the care of those who struggle with or are addicted to pornography.
It’s unlikely that the confrontational narcissism and entitlement at the foundation of this interaction can be resolved by supporting their focus on pornography as “the problem” by advocating abstinence.
In fact, if we encourage people to concentrate on “fighting pornography,” we are more likely to strengthen their feelings of hostility and victimhood.
In contrast to challenging feelings of victimhood and confronting dispositions towards an external locus of control, the modern porn addiction treatment industry and online discussions of porn addiction seem to feed and enable narcissism.
People who seek help because of their pornographic behaviour should have this possibility of feelings of entitlement, perceived victimhood, and difficulties taking responsibility for their actions explored as part of their treatment.
Boyfriend’s Narcissism: Telltale Signs, If You Have A Narcissist Boyfriend Then What?
When you first met your boyfriend, perhaps you felt a strong attraction. At the beginning of your relationship, he came across as charming, helpful, and supportive.
However, you may see a different side of him emerge with time. He was kind, but now he’s abusive, possessive, and controlling. As a result, protecting yourself from potential harm requires early detection of narcissistic relationship patterns.
The 11 telltale symptoms your partner is a narcissist are as follows:
1. Too Much, Too Fast
Your lover may have showered you with excessive affection at the beginning of your relationship. Narcissists use This common tactic to get you to commit to them quickly before you have time to see through their facade.
2, Sharing Too Much Too Soon In The Relationship
Your boo spills the beans on his personal life much too early, making it clear that you’re the first and only person he’s ever shared everything like this with. Making you feel like you have more in common than you do is as simple as convincing you that you are unique enough to trust.
3. Extremely Self-Conscious
At first, you thought it was great that your partner was so assured of himself, especially in group settings. But now he seems cocky and rude, always talking over others and taking the spotlight away from you. Feelings of anger and hurt are natural responses, but they can negatively affect your emotions and self-image.
4, A Success Junkie,
Your boyfriend’s aspirations to amass great fortune and power may have pleased you. This could be a warning indication that your partner is a grandiose narcissist more invested in his ego than in you and your relationship.
5. He Gives You no Encouragement
Narcissistic guys are emotionally detached and insensitive to the sentiments and needs of those around them. You’ve realized that your guy is never there to be a comforting and encouraging companion when you really need him to be. The more detached he is, the more like a piece of furniture you may start to feel in the relationship.
6, You Need More Time For Your Private Life.
Narcissists tend to be quite demanding of their partners. You’ve noticed that you’ve been putting your boyfriend’s needs before your own, and that’s a problem. This can be emotionally draining, stifle your development, and make you feel less like yourself.
When a spouse doesn’t do what the narcissist wants, the narcissist may resort to stonewalling. Thus, you may be dealing with a narcissist if your boyfriend routinely gives you silent treatment when he’s furious at you or shuts down when you want to address an important topic. They will probably continue to use psychological coercion on you.
When narcissists want to manipulate their spouse into doubting their judgment, they resort to gaslighting. You may start to doubt the world and maybe even your sanity. Your boyfriend’s narcissism is on full display here, and he will likely continue to use this manipulation strategy in the future.
Any form of manipulation in your relationship qualifies as emotional abuse and can have profound mental health effects. Narcissistic abuse syndrome, the outcome of prolonged exposure to a manipulator, can be difficult to overcome without professional help.
10, Controlled By Tensions
Narcissists have a deep-seated dread of being rejected or abandoned by a romantic relationship. If their facade were to fall, we might see a string of controlling actions from them. You may be at risk because of your boyfriend’s narcissistic behavior if he is excessively possessive jealous, isolates you from loved ones, or limits who you can spend time with.
11 Risky and Irrational Actions
Many potentially harmful actions are linked to narcissism. There should be a major cause for concern if you notice behavior patterns like compulsive gambling, excessive purchasing, excessive drinking, or narcissistic infidelity. Staying with your boyfriend will stress your life if these problems aren’t remedied.
The Narcissistic Boyfriend: Strategies for Coping
Suppose you suspect your partner is a narcissist. In that case, he may not realize or care to address his actions’ negative effects on the relationship. However, you can still take steps to safeguard your mental health and have better interactions. Some examples of this might be establishing clear limits, avoiding arguments, reaching out for help, prioritizing your well-being, etc.
What to do when your boyfriend is a narcissist:
Set Firm Boundaries
Insisting in their own way, no matter how it makes you feel, is a red flag that the person you see is a narcissist. Therefore, it is crucial to establish firm limits within your connection.
Set clear boundaries for appropriate physical, emotional, and sexual behavior and ensure they are respected. In case these aren’t met, feel free to walk away. If your boyfriend does try to cross the line, you can protect yourself by setting and sticking to clear boundaries.
Make Yourself Heard!
Don’t let your feelings cloud your judgment; wait until you can speak calmly and be understood. Then, be forthright about how your boyfriend’s actions make you feel and what you require from him.
Fair fighting norms, such as refraining from personal attacks and instead focusing on the other person’s points of view, help set the tone for the conversation. A less stressful strategy to establish yourself and move towards healthy ways of engaging with your lover is to follow an organized conversation.
Narcissists tend to see things in extremes, making debate fruitless. Therefore, resolving a dispute with a narcissist in a relationship can be much more challenging. Furthermore, when challenged, they frequently become hostile and explosive.
And that’s why you and your lover should just “agree to disagree” or refrain from arguing altogether. If you don’t know how to handle conflict well, it might hurt your mental health.
Just Ignore it And Go On.
Your lover may randomly criticize, attack, or say harsh things to you. If you care about maintaining your self-worth and confidence, try not to take things personally. These unacceptable behaviors cause you to pause and consider the potential mental and emotional costs of continuing this connection.
Care For Yourself First.
Maybe you’ve been putting your boyfriend’s wants before your own, so you’ve forgotten who you are. Therefore, you must shift your focus to caring for yourself. Put your mental health first by ensuring you’re getting enough food, rest, and exercise.
Yoga walks, cardio and a healthy diet are great ways to calm down. Include things like starting a new hobby, helping others, going on vacation, etc., that are both enjoyable and wholesome (apart from the relationship). Self-care is important since it improves health and decreases anxiety.
Seek the Advice of Experts
Pay attention to your emotional well-being as well as your physical one. Meeting with a mental health expert who can create an atmosphere of safety and acceptance can be helpful.
You can get the help and assistance you need to handle your relationship with a narcissist by going to counseling. Finally, a trained counselor can help you recognize abusive or dangerous patterns in your relationships with narcissists.
Get in Touch with People!
You need to get the encouragement and focus you need from your narcissistic lover. That’s why it’s important to keep in touch with old pals and make some new ones to get the support and affirmation you crave.
Feelings of isolation can be eased by making contact with supportive people. This could prove difficult if your boyfriend is actively trying to isolate you. Nonetheless, it’s critical to remember this safety net’s significance.
Learn as much as you can about narcissism before rushing into a new relationship. Knowing if and to what extent your lover is a narcissist requires understanding this disorder and its nuances.
It can also help you determine if another mental health problem is involved. You’ll be better positioned to handle the relationship, safeguard your emotional health, or reevaluate it.
Learn to Recognise Your Exit Point
Breaking up is tough, especially if you’ve grown attached to your spouse. If your boyfriend has been violent or abusive towards you, has engaged in undesirable behavior, lacks the attributes you need and deserve in a person, or is negatively impacting your mental health, it’s time to quit the relationship.
As many narcissists grow outraged and aggressive when their partners are leaving the relationship, it’s important to ensure you’re well-protected before you do.
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